Bound by My Scandalous Pregnancy Page 18

  ‘This is for your own good.’

  I couldn’t help the laughter that spilled out. ‘Is it, though? You know what you remind me of, Neo? My father. Always looking for something better! You changed the rules to suit you when you decided you wanted a wife, not just in name, but in your bed. Then you changed them again because you can’t handle a little challenge. I’ve outlived my usefulness to you in one area. So you’re shelving me until you get the other things that you want.’

  His jaw clenched. ‘No—what your father did, he did for himself. What I’m doing is for you.’

  ‘Trust me to know my own mind! Believe me when I tell you what’s in my heart.’

  He lost another layer of colour, but his eyes blazed with quiet fury. ‘I’ve made my decision. But know that besides my absence, nothing changes.’

  ‘That’s where you’re wrong. I’ve changed. I know my own worth now. I know I want more than this. I won’t be bargained with, or put on a shelf to suit you. So if you think your world is going to stay trouble-free because you’ve laid down the law, think again.’

  ‘What’s that supposed to mean?’

  I shrugged dismissively, even though it was the last thing I felt like doing. ‘I guess we’ll find out. Goodbye, Neo.’

  He stayed put, his gaze fixed in that way that said he was assessing me for weakness.

  And because I wasn’t sure how long I could stay put without cracking, I turned away from him, closed my eyes and simply pretended he wasn’t there.

  I heard the ominous snick of the door a minute later.

  Then the tears fell—long and hard and shattering.

  It was supposed to work.

  The punishing schedule.

  The soul-sucking jet lag.

  The endless meetings.

  Hell, even barking at executives was supposed to make me feel better. To fuel the conviction that I was doing the right thing.

  She’d accused me of being like her father. Initially it had provided sustaining anger, and I’d burned in the righteousness of believing myself the exact opposite.

  But, as relentless as time’s march, the kernel of truth had expanded...like a weird, never-ending concentric circle that echoed its presence in my quiet moments.

  First I’d used her to salve the bad news she’d delivered. Then, from the moment she’d announced she was carrying my child, I’d pinned her to me—my last hope of fatherhood and I was determined to have it, regardless of the fact that I lacked the effective tools to be a father. And during the process, I’d hammered out an agreement that bound her to me only until I had what I wanted.

  And when I’d decided I wanted more, I’d worked on the problem until she’d fallen into my arms.

  Only then had I realised the full impact of more. That, while I could give her every material and carnal pleasure she desired, I was the one who was too greedy. Too selfish. Because I’d never stopped to think that she would want more too. Or that I was equipped to deal with her demand.

  Fate had given me the rudest wake-up call. And, as much as every moment of breathing turned me inside out, Sadie deserved for me to stay away. She deserved the peace to bear her child without my greedy, demanding presence. Without the wants and needs and longings that clawed at me every hour of every day, sullying her beautiful existence.

  So what if the thought of going another minute, another hour, without seeing her face killed me?

  You’ll simply have to suffer!

  My intercom sounded, ripping another curse from my throat.

  ‘I was quite explicit in my desire not to be disturbed.’

  Because I deserved at least ten minutes of undiluted torment each hour, even as other minutes provided unending agony.

  ‘Yes, sir, but I thought you should know—’

  ‘Save your breath. Warning him won’t do any good.’

  I jackknifed up from my position against the dark wall in my office. Took a step forward and steadied myself against the dizzying effect of her.

  Two long weeks during which only the security cameras installed at the villa had provided woefully brief glimpses of this goddess who carried my child. During which daily reports of her improved health and blooming pregnancy had sustained my raging hunger for her.

  And now she was here.

  A vision in white cotton that clung to her bust, her hips and, Christos, the magnificent protrusion of her belly. Her hair was twisted into an elaborate crown on top of her head, further proclaiming her celestial status.

  It was all I could do not to fall at her feet in sublime worship of her, this woman who held a heart unworthy of her. This woman who’d exploded into my life and claimed a place in it I never wanted back.

  God, would I ever get over the impact of Neo Xenakis?

  I doubted it.

  Or else every single vow I’d taken and every form of punishment I’d devised for myself in a wild bid to stop thinking about him, stop dreaming about him, would have worked.

  Instead, each day had brought a bracing kind of hell. A craving that went against all common sense.

  I’d driven Callie quite mad with my pathetic stoicism. While I wanted to blame her for appointing herself chief nursemaid, I’d eventually taken pity on her—succumbed when she’d called up the Xenakis jet and arranged an intercontinental flight, along with a doctor, much to the chagrin of her husband.

  From Neo’s poleaxed expression now, Axios had kept the secret.

  The look was morphing, though, the shock wearing off.

  His gaze rushed over me and he paled a little before his eyes narrowed. ‘What are you doing here?’ he bit out.

  Despite its tension, the sound of his voice sent tingles down my spine.

  I closed the gap between us by another few steps, my heart kicking against my ribs when his eyes dropped to my distended stomach.

  ‘I work for this company, remember? Unless those privileges have been revoked too?’

  ‘You know exactly what I mean. You should be resting. In Athens. Not...not...’ He stopped. Frowned.

  ‘Have you forgotten where you are?’ I asked. ‘You’re in Costa Rica...negotiating to buy the country’s second-largest airline.’

  His frown intensified. ‘Thanks for the reminder. My statement still stands.’

  ‘Does it? Perhaps if you’d been at home I wouldn’t have needed to cross continents to have a conversation with you.’

  His mouth worked and he swallowed noisily. ‘Sadie—’

  ‘No.’ I took another few steps, then stopped when his aftershave hit me like a brick of sensation. ‘You don’t get to speak. Not until I’ve said what’s on my mind. And even then, the jury’s out as to whether I want to hear what you have to say.’

  ‘This is the third time you’ve stormed my office since we met.’

  ‘It seems to be the only place where I can get through to you.’

  A raw gleam lit his grey eyes before his expression tightened. ‘That’s not entirely true. But, parakalo, whatever you have to say to me, do it while sitting down?’

  ‘And ruin this superb effect I’m having on you?’

  His fist tightened with the blatant need to bodily compel me to the sofa. ‘What do you want, Sadie?’

  ‘For you to come home. Or give me a divorce.’

  He lost another shade of colour. ‘What?’

  ‘Two choices. Take one or the other. But I’m not leaving here without an answer.’

  ‘You dare to—’

  ‘Oh, I do. Very much. Because you know what? I’ve decided there’s nothing you can do to me. Sue the mother of your child? I think not. Toss me out of your company? I’ll just find another job, because I’m good at what I do. But I don’t think you want to lose my professional skills either. Really, all that’s standing in our way is you.’

  His breathing intensifi
ed and he looked, shockingly, as if he was on the brink of hyperventilating. ‘You think any of this has been easy, Sadie?’

  The raw note in his voice caught at that vulnerable spot I’d never been able to protect, ever since our first meeting.

  I stepped into his space, uncaring for my own heart, and glared with everything I had. ‘You walked away. And stayed away. You tell me.’

  ‘It’s been torture!’ he yelled. ‘I reach for you at night and you’re not there. I turn to throw a question at you in the boardroom and find some lame executive staring back at me. You’ve ruined me for everything! For everyone! You were supposed to bewitch me for a little while. Until I satisfied the craving you triggered. Instead you’re all I think about—every second of every day.’

  My heart swan-dived right to my toes, then dared to beat its wings faster, to climb and climb and hope.

  ‘Keep...keep talking.’

  ‘That night, when you accused me of not moving forward, I couldn’t answer your charge because somewhere along the line I’d gone from holding you to a higher standard to recognising that I couldn’t meet those standards myself.’

  ‘What are you talking about?’

  ‘I’ve held myself back from giving my all emotionally all my life, Sadie. My grandfather did and look where he ended up. When Anneka told me she was pregnant I immediately offered her my name and my wealth, but nothing else. I knew I didn’t love her and, aside from her betrayal and the lesson that delivered, I haven’t spared her a thought since I threw her out of my life. But you...’

  He stopped, swallowed.

  ‘I spent weeks after our first meeting unable to get you out of my mind. When you turned up in my office in Athens I thought you felt the same. That you’d simply been better at plotting a reconnection.’

  ‘Instead I dropped another bombshell in your life.’

  He shook his head, jerked closer until we were breathing the same air. ‘Instead you held out your hands and presented me with the most precious gift any man who wishes to be a father could ask for.’

  ‘So you believe our baby is yours?’

  ‘I believed you before we landed back in London that day. A woman who goes to great pains to admit her wrongdoing when she could have run a mile and passed the blame to others is a woman of integrity, in my book. Even when I gave you the chance to pass the blame on to your boss, you didn’t.’

  ‘If you knew all that, then why?’

  He shrugged, that domineering alpha male rising to the fore. ‘Because I’m a negotiator, Sadie. I played my cards close to my chest to gain the upper hand. I wanted our child, but I wanted you even more. I could’ve dispatched you back to London, had a security team watch you and swoop in to negotiate terms of custody once the baby was born.’

  ‘But you didn’t because you wanted me? Past tense?’

  ‘Oh, no, glikia mou. Not even close to past tense. It’s very present. Very real. So much it scares me.’

  Something electric lit up inside me. ‘Is that why you’re hiding here on the other side of the world? Because you’re scared?’

  ‘I’m here because I don’t deserve you. As much as I want to negotiate my way back to you, I can’t stand the possibility that you’ll wake up one day and be disappointed.’

  ‘My God. You’ve put us through all this suffering because for the first time in your life you’re experiencing the very human emotion of self-doubt?’

  He frowned. ‘Sadie, this isn’t a flimsy—’

  ‘You think I wasn’t scared to death when I realised I was in love with you? That I haven’t wanted to tear my hair out to see if it would bring me a moment’s relief from the constant ache of loving you and not knowing whether you love me back?’

  His gorgeous lips dropped open in shock. ‘Christos, Sadie. I—’

  ‘I’m a pregnant woman nearing her third trimester, Neo. The next words out of your mouth had better be words I want to hear.’

  His arms darted out, caught me to him, as if he was afraid I’d flee when in fact my legs were threatening to stop supporting me.

  ‘Let’s get one thing clear. You’re never to touch a hair on your head with an aim of tearing it out. Ever. But, more importantly, Sadie...if this madness inside me that yearns only for you, if this heart that beats true only when you’re near, means this is love, then I love you. And if it’s not, if I get it wrong somewhere along the way, I know I’ll have you there to steer me true. For a chance to be at your side through this life I will leave the negotiations to you, follow your lead. Show me how to love, Sadie, and I will be your apt pupil for the rest of our lives.’

  The depth of his promise took the last ounce of strength from my legs. He caught me up, as I knew he would, strode over to the sofa and sank into it.

  ‘Okay, if that’s what it takes. Here’s your first lesson. You never leave me behind again.’

  ‘I vow it,’ he replied, with feeling.

  I rearranged myself in his lap, framed his face between my hands. ‘You bring any doubts you have to me. We fix and grow and love together. But most of all, Neo, you just open your heart, let me love you and our baby. We’ll be the best versions of ourselves we can be for our family and trust the rest to take care of itself. Will you do that?’

  A suspicious sheen glistened in his eyes. But he didn’t look away, didn’t blink it back. He just stared into my eyes and nodded. ‘You have yourself a deal, amorfo mou.’

  ‘Good. Now, please kiss me. Then please take me home.’

  EPILOGUE

  ‘IT’S TIME, NEO.’

  Heels clicked closer as my wife entered our bedroom and crossed over to where I stood at the window.

  ‘Our guests are wondering if the two of you are planning to join the festivities—especially since you’re holding the guest of honour hostage,’ she teased.

  I was torn between staring at the vision Sadie created in her white Grecian-style dress and the precious bundle I held in my arms.

  With her flaming hair piled on top of her head in an elaborate knot, and the skin I’d explored thoroughly just a few hours ago glowing, Sadie won the attention-grabbing stakes. But only by a fraction.

  My son—thee mou, would I ever stop being awed by the miracle of him?—three months old and in good health, came a very close second.

  ‘Five more minutes?’ I cradled his warmth closer, unwilling to share him just yet.

  Sadie shook her head, smiling widely as she approached, her swaying hips wreaking havoc with my breathing.

  ‘You said that twenty minutes ago. I know you don’t care what anyone else thinks, but I have a good brownie point system going with your family. I don’t want to ruin it.’

  ‘Impossible. Every person out there loves you—they wouldn’t been invited to Helios’s christening otherwise.’

  Her beautiful eyes widened. ‘You didn’t have Wendell vet them, did you?’

  I shrugged. ‘Maybe...’

  She laughed, and the sound burrowed deep, stirring emotions I hadn’t imagined I could experience just a handful of months ago.

  But then, so many things had changed since that day in Costa Rica. Sadie had introduced me to the phenomenon of unconditional love, her giving heart and fearless love challenging mine to reciprocate. And the result continued to astound me daily. Even the atmosphere of cool indifference with my parents had began to thaw under Sadie’s expert guidance.

  She insisted the birth of our miracle son was the reason.

  I disagreed.

  ‘Well, just to let you know, our mothers are this close to staging a break-in to claim their grandson,’ she said with a stunning smile. ‘I estimate you have about a minute.’

  ‘Then I’ll make the most of it. Come to me, agape mou,’ I murmured, greedy for more of this soul-stirring feeling.

  ‘I love it when you call me that,’ she said when she reach
ed me, one hand sliding around my waist, her other caressing Helios’s black-maned head. ‘He’s so beautiful—our little miracle.’

  The overwhelming love and wonder I felt was echoed in her voice.

  ‘He’s as beautiful as his exceptional mama, but moro mou, you’re our miracle, Sadie. Without you, our lives wouldn’t be this full, mine changed for ever for the better,’ I said.

  Beautiful green eyes blinked back tears, and when she went on tiptoe to kiss me I met her halfway, revelling in the supreme contentment that this gorgeous creature was mine. That she had given me a son despite my doctors still scratching their heads over tests that showed such a feat was impossible.

  Their verdict was that Helios might be the only child Sadie and I would have. But who were they to make pronouncements? I already had the miracle of love and fatherhood. Nothing was impossible.

  When we broke the kiss Sadie sighed, resting her head on my shoulder. ‘Okay, Neo. Five more minutes. But I get to stay too.’

  As if I would let her go.

  ‘Agapita, you should know by now that I wouldn’t have it any other way.’

  Coming next month

  THE SCANDAL BEHIND THE ITALIAN’S WEDDING

  Millie Adams

  “Why did you do it, Minerva?”

  “I am sorry. I really didn’t do it to cause you trouble. But I’m being threatened, and so is Isabella, and in order to protect us both I needed to come up with an alternative paternity story.”

  “An alternative paternity story?”

  She winced. “Yes. Her father is after her.”

  He eyed her with great skepticism. “I didn’t think you knew who her father was.”

  She didn’t know whether to be shocked, offended or pleased that he thought her capable of having an anonymous interlude.

  For heaven’s sake, she’d only ever been kissed one time in her life. A regrettable evening out with Katie in Rome where she’d tried to enjoy the pulsing music in the club, but had instead felt overheated and on the verge of a seizure.

  She’d danced with a man in a shiny shirt—and she even knew his name because she wouldn’t even dance with a man without an introduction—and he’d kissed her on the dance floor. It had been wet and he’d tasted of liquor and she’d feigned a headache after and taken a cab back to the hostel they’d been staying in.